weird old forgotten tumblr things that I never see included in this sort of list:

raeadropofgoldensunshine:

  • ah, the scalene triangle
  • loving Cole Sprouse
  • hating Cole Sprouse 
    • the tons of “social experiment” memes that followed
  • the first wave of Actual Cannibal Shia LaBaeuf memes from before there was even a video for it
  • trying to trick “hipster” blogs into reblogging fandom content 
    • the whole strict dichotomy between fandom and hipster blogs as a whole tbh
  • “I was here here before MTV!”
  • 12.9 year olds
  • “what is air” and “my ovaries” 
  • non-tumblr people were peasants
  • nice legs daisy dukes
  • slideshows with comic sans and sometimes making your mom or sibling comment on some cringey show they’d never seen
  • homestuck
  • tumblr user pizza (what ever happened to them???)
  • tumblr user the-vashta-nerada 
  • Nine In The Afternoon jokes/references all the time??
  • imagine how is touch the sky
  • “you tried” stars and all the variations thereupon
  • do she got the booty?
  • “can you give me directions to the olive garden?”
  • night bloggers 

add more help me relive the past 6 years i’ve wasted on this garbage website

ndiecity:

The sun is probably the closest thing we’ll ever have to a true Eldritch Abomination. Hear me out here-

  • Older than recorded history; was here longer than any of us and will be here long after we leave. Has a finite beginning and end but is still incomprehensibly ancient
  • Burns itself into your vision instantly and can blind you if you look for too long
  • Further prolonged exposure can cause cancerous growths
  • Non-humanoid shape floating through space; colossal flaming tentacles angrily lash out on occasion
  • Sort of just appeared one day and is now surrounded by the corpses of its stillborn children
  • People used to sacrifice other people to appease it
  • Pretty sure it screams at us sometimes

sakakoura:

I know everyone realizes that disney amvs are a gold mine but as someone who has been collecting them for years I am telling you right now: the ones that blow up on tumblr are only the absolute tip of the iceberg.  

here’s some personal favorites of mine.  synopsis included. 

keep in mind that none of these are parody videos.  they’re all 100% serious I promise you

cinderella’s sister gets plastic surgery because she doesn’t think jim from treasure planet likes her so she turns into jessica rabbit 

a “the fault in our stars” trailer made with footage of elsa from frozen and raphael from teenage mutant ninja turtles

 willy wonka and the guy from howl’s moving castle break up

anna from frozen has to choose between actors ashton kutcher and owen wilson

twilight sparkle hates herself for falling in love with jim from treasure planet because he’s a human boy

sleeping beauty has an affair with rule 63 esmerelda and they get caught and die

andy and woody from toy story turn into the men from brokeback mountain and fall in love with each other

in this one titties are edited onto jasmine for jim from treasure planets possessed fuck fest 

real life porn is used to show that loki and draco malfoy are having sex

everyone is harley quinn and the joker. every single person

peter pan loses a beyblade competition to aladdin and I think his dad leaves him for it but they fall in love

aplasticshark:

skidji:

thorsbian:

Best tumblr scandals

  • The girl grave robbing and selling human bones online
  • The white american girl who pretended to be an interracial lesbian couple living with hiv in india, just so she could write hamilton hiv fic
  • The girl everyone thought was the native lesbian writer of my immortal, who wrote it to find her brother, but it turns out she was white and lied about her backstory and probably didn’t even write the fic
  • Russian Chaos Agents

Add more if u want, lord knows theres plenty

for all the people in the notes asking for sources/more info:

all or nothing

beastmilk jewelry

bone thief

cancer scam

child slavery

cole sprouse’s social experiment

confusedtree

constablefrozen

cybersmith

dashcon

evilfemme

firebolting

freebleeding

glitchedpuppet

hiv hamilton fanfic

homestuck bucket video

homestuck sharpie bath

komaeda kin finger hoax

leelah project

lifting community

“made her eat the doodoo”

medicine switching murder

memeufacturing

miss officer and mr. truffles

mod silver

my immortal author hoax

needle-filled cookie

piss jello

russian agents

toe necklace

unliscenced therapy

i apologize if any of these links are less than savory; if there are any better sources please lmk

thank you so much but also curse you